Say yes to diversity

In a time in which everything seems to go against diversity, in which global politics are at heat, and in which countries are closing borders and becoming more and more racist, INSEAD promotes multiculturalism and diversity.

This video was shot in a few hours, outside INSEAD's main reception. It reflects what INSEAD truly is, and one of its main differentiating factors. I feel so lucky and proud for being part of this.

#diversityINSEAD
#diversityisINSEAD
#inseadmoments

Special thanks to Gorda for having helped Chantal, Thomas and me putting this together!

It's getting real baby!

A bit over 3 months before the wedding, it was about time to re-focus on wedding prep. Last weekend was very productive in that sense!

I travelled home for Easter, and Mom, Dad and I met Gorda and his entire family at Vila Nova - our favorite place on Earth and the future venue of our big day. We fixed our list of invites for the wedding, we defined the church decoration, we advanced the list of presents, we thought about names for the dinner tables, we checked some constraints about the tent, we talked to the caterer (who happens to be our friend), we scheduled one more meeting with the wedding planners, we talked to someone who works in the municipality to make sure we won't have any issue in the village during our big day... We did a lot! On top of that, we spent quality time all together, enjoyed the sun, ate amazing regional food, and our families became even closer.

We managed to travel back to Lisbon on time to see most of the Bentos. Missed them!

On Monday, Mom and me did two incredibly important things: we tried our dresses for the big day (which implied traveling over 600 km in one day) and bought my wedding shoes. IT'S GETTING REAL BABY!

There's no place like home. There's no one like family. And I love mine...!

Bon week-end à Paris

Last weekend was great. I had my favorite people in town - Mom, Dad and Gorda - and we only did my kind of stuff.

The three of them arrived late on Friday, and met me at the hotel around 11 pm. We left for a very Parisian dinner, at a bistro - one of those with all the chairs facing to the street - called Saint Germain. We were, indeed, staying at Saint-Germain-de-Près, a lovely neighborhood.

I managed to convince my old man and lady to wake up later than usual and only have breakfast around 10-ish. Before breakfast, I managed to do a quick workout and go for a coffee with Mom and Dad. We had a nice fat breakfast at Le Pain Quotidien, still in Saint Germain, after which Mom and I told Gorda and Dad that we needed some time by ourselves. There was some wedding shoes hunting to be done! Shoe hunting was quite productive (we think we found the shoes of our dreams) but we never felt very comfortable about not being with our men. Two hours later, we met at Le Bon Marché, and spent the rest of the day altogether.

We checked La Grand Epicerie de Paris, had an amazing (and healthy) lunch at Judy, and then walked through half Paris: Les Invalides, La Concorde, Les Tuileries, Louvre, La Seine, Pont des Arcs and Pont Neuf. Before Pont Neuf, we stopped by the Seine for a drink with some INSEAD friends of mine, under a glorious sun. You cannot imagine how good of a day it was - warm and sunny. At Pont Neuf, Gorda tried to knee down again for a picture but got ditched this time. hahaha

By 7 pm, we were back to the hotel for a quick nap before an incredible dinner. I had booked a table at Le Georges, and thank god I did so. Le Georges is a fancy modern restaurant at the top of Pompidou. It has an amazing view, a very cool environment and very yummy food. Win!

After dinner, my old man and woman went back to the hotel and Gorda and I met our friends at a very weird yet entertaining cabaret. Before 2 am we were in bed as well.

Sunday was a great day too. The plan was to explore Marais and the surroundings. We walked there after checking out from the hotel, and arrived around 11 am. In the meantime, we walked through the Paris Marathon and watched it for a while. As we arrived in Marais, everyone was starving but the place I had in mind for a Sunday brunch, Benedict, would not open until 12 pm. We decided to check another place, Café Charlot, which refused to serve us neither breakfast or brunch because it was transitioning between the two. We then decided to walk back to the original place. What a smart idea!

Brunch was then at Benedict. Nomnomnomnomnom. We highly recommend it, mainly if you order the Italian Eggs Benedict. Portions were so generous that no one had lunch later in the day. The restaurant is pretty cool too. We had a great time.

After brunch, we (especially Mom) explored a few stores in Marais, and then checked Notre Dame, Shakespear & Co. bookstore, and a few other locations around Seine. At some point, we stopped for a drink as our legs were starting to feel the several kms we walked in less than two days. Around 4 pm, we were back to the hotel. Mom and Dad stayed, while Gorda and I walked a few other kms to meet some friends of mine at Arc du Triomphe. Three of my friends managed to finish the Marathon (!!!!!!) and wanted me to drive their car to Fontainebleau because their legs would not allow them to do so.

Goodbyes were easy this time, as we knew we would be together again in four days. Guess what? I am currently at the Orly Airport, waiting for a flight back home.

Thank you Mom and Dad for such a nice weekend, for all the love and good meals, and for treating Gorda and me so well. Can't wait for our July to repeat this weekend, this time with Mico as well. See you all soon!

Reflections

I know that this post should be about the incredible weekend I had with Mom, Dad and Gorda in Paris. But it won't be. Sorry Mom, Dad, and Gorda. There's a crucial topic I need to write about before describing the amazing days we spent together.

Work life balance

Or should I even call it:

Women in the workplace?

This may be the hottest topic on my mind at the moment. Not that it is more important than the wedding prep, all that I am learning at INSEAD, or the exploration of recruitment opportunities... But it is certainly a common element of all those.

As Anne Marie Slaughter mentioned in her article "Women can't have it all", this may not be a life-or-dead topic and is not even close to being the most significant issue that women face worldwide. There are single moms out there, as well as moms in very poor families that, rather than thinking about their dream jobs and equal opportunities among genders, need to ensure that their salary (together with their husband's) is enough for their family to survive. Whoever, it is striking how most of the explanations and solutions to this problem don't seem to be entirely true.

In Portugal, more women apply to college, more women graduate from college and, on average, with better grades. Women have theoretically the same opportunities and education than men. So why is Portugal one of the countries yet to have a minimum one woman on every board?

Is it a matter of commitment? Is it the famous Sheryl Sandberg "ambition gap"? I cannot believe I am the only committed ambitious girl in the world. In fact, my experiences both at INSEAD and at BCG have shown me that I am certainly not. Is it the system's fault? School and working schedules are still not aligned, maternity leaves are yet not gender-equal in most countries in the world, face time at the office still matters, and so on. Is it social pressure? Are women just not meant to be as or more successful than men?

Finding the right partner helps. All successful women who are not single claim that they were only able to have a reasonable work-life balance thanks to their husbands. In that sense, I could hardly be luckier. Gorda will have my back at all times and he even says that he won't mind working slightly less hours when we have kids. But is that enough? Will I be ok with leaving part of the childcare to him? Do men have the same instinct as women? Am I replaceable? Better, do I want to be replaceable? No!!! Can both of us contribute and still ensure we reach our goals? Is that possible? Tell me, tell me.

It's frustrating not to have an answer to all this questions, but is reassuring to think like Slaughter: "In sum, having a supportive mate may well be a necessary condition if women are to have it all, but it is not sufficient". At least having the right hubby helps!

This is a crucial/ life-changing year in my life. Somehow, I managed to decide to explore all vectors possible. There's one MBA, a wedding, a new house and eventually an entire career on the table. I just decided I want to run a marathon by the end of 2017 too. Coming soon, there will be promotions and children on the table too. How to deal with all these? And how to succeed?

I will have to smartly decide when it is going to be the right time to get pregnant, bearing in mind that the more I invest on my career now, the quicker I will reach my dream job - but also that the later I have kids, the higher the chances of not having a hard time getting pregnant and/or not having the right physical capabilities to raise my kids. In my opinion, the trick may be having the kids still at a relatively young (not old) age, but adapting your lifestyle and working style accordingly. That may require searching for a job as much predictable as possible, as well as working still quite long hours but organized in different ways (from home, before anyone is already awake or even late in the evening, after putting the kids in bed). Another trick may be putting time horizons in perspective. Maybe I don't need to be a COO in 10 years - doing so in in 15 years or more is quite an achievement too.

This period at INSEAD, I have more than one fluffy classes. One of them - Psychological Issues in Management - has been especially relevant to me. On one hand, it covers all the topics mentioned in this post (that have filled my headspace so heavily in the recent past). On the other hand, our professor is probably the most inspiring one I've had at INSEAD - a successful, determined, good looking female, with amazing communication skills and an impressive touch and feel for anything related to social and psychological topics.

For our last PIM class, we had to write our "10-year profile statement" and share it with a few of our colleagues. Below, you can see a sanitized version of what I wrote:

10 years after graduating from INSEAD, I am leaving in Portugal, with my husband and three kids. I have recently been promoted to COO of a solid Portuguese firm based in Lisbon but with relevant presence worldwide. I work a lot, have quite some responsibility (and the stressful challenges attached to it) but somehow manage to enjoy much more visibility over my life and schedule than I used to when I was a Consultant at BCG.

I now have 10-hour days instead of the previous average of 14-hour ones, and organize them in a different way. I keep doing my early morning workout with my husband. I leave the kids at school and he picks them up in the afternoon. We meet at home around 7 pm, and enjoy a family activity and dinner together, after monitoring the kids’ baths. After the kids are back in bed (early), I work from home for about two more hours. This has been quite a shift from my life 11 years before, only possible due to a good reflective process throughout my MBA.

In fact, at some point, I made the hard decision of leaving BCG and entering the corporate world. I knew it would be reflected in a slower career progression and a significant cut in my paycheck. However, I was urged to ensure a reasonable work-life balance that the consulting world failed at providing me. Such transition into the corporate world resulted in certain challenges, both personal and professional. Personally, I had to delay (by a couple of years) a desired first pregnancy in order to prove myself first in the new job. Professionally, I had to adjust to a slower-paced environment, to a less diverse day-to-day life, and to working with the same team at all times.

Is this too optimistic? Is this totally unreal? Is this selfish? Is this not feminine? Is it something a MBA student feels obliged to write? I will tell you what it is: it's quite aspirational and eventually not feasible. But eventually it may be slightly less aspirational if I adjust the timeframe (15-year profile instead? 20? Even more?) or if the world changes in the meantime.

Being concerned about the success of women in the workplace is a crucial step so that, one day, it becomes a non-topic. Until then, discussion about gender discrimination, inequality, and the necessary changes in regulation, mindset, social norms, quotas, and more, cannot be avoided.

I am sorry if you think that I am egocentric for being concerned about my future professional success and its compatibility with the personal life I dream about. Let me put it in a different way. The opportunities of each generation depend on the behaviors and fights of the earlier generations. As Slaughter pointed out, if more women with the same concerns as mine fight for what they want and raise awareness about this issue, eventually it will be easier for the future women leaders to make it to the top.

Once, in a conference I help organizing for the MBA Portugal Network, Rui Diniz shared with the audience his key to success: managing the professional and personal lives hand-in-hand. Having a stable happy personal life is crucial for anyone to succeed in their professional life. Every relevant professional decision should be discussed as a couple and can only go through if there is personal support to it. Being professionally successful, in turn, helps having a comfortable personal life.

My plan for the future is to always balance my career with my future husband and kids, not forgetting aging parents and social commitments. Easy, uh? Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...!

Stressful times

P4 has been, by far, the period with the most stressful environment since the beginning of INSEAD. Recruitment season has started, and the end of the MBA program is just around the corner. Everyone feels the urge to find a job - and preferable a job that helps paying back such a high investment that an MBA is.

Since the first week of P4, different companies have been on campus. There were several company presentations everyday, corporate lunches and cocktails, coffee-chats, informal talks, informative e-mails and brochures, and more.

Over 50% of the MBA candidates want to move into consulting. Note that over 30% of MBA candidates are already consultants. Summing the two numbers up, if everyone got their dream job, most of INSEAD would be future consultants. Crazy, uh? What does this mean. It means that thousands of mock interviews happened in the past weeks (months) on campus. Applicants for consulting have been preparing themselves like crazy, and those who are already consultants (like me!) end up helping them out. Between P3 and P4, I did over 30 mock interviews to friends, and even people I don't know. A girl gotta do what a girl gotta do! Hopefully, I am helping future leaders being offered a job that will help them ramping up their careers.

Other multinationals have been on campus too. Microsoft, Amazon, Kraft Heinz, and others, started interviewing already too. Paths such as Venture Capital, Private Equity and so on require each people to work by themselves outside the INSEAD channels.

Last weekend, to run away from such stressful times on campus, I went to Paris. It was Catarina Calha's birthday and we had 8 friends visiting. We had good food, walked a lot, did some sightseeing but mostly enjoyed the city. We stayed in Marais, and walked through Marais, Saint Germain, Madeleine, Monnaie... What a lovely weekend. Check some pictures below.

This weekend, Mom, Dad and Gorda will be in town. Going to Paris to wait for them now. Yeyyyyyy!

Say yes to fatty

Last weekend was my official bachelorette party and I just had the most amazing time with my most amazing friends. Literally.

By 3:30 pm, Calha and I left INSEAD towards a supposedly secret location that was not so secret anymore. In mid February, Luísa got so excited when she watched a movie of me dancing funk like a true Brazilian that she shouted "You're so ready for Barcelona!!!”. Hahaha. But that was all I knew about the weekend. I had no idea about what we were going to do nor who would be there. My dear bridesmaids (Alice, Calha, Lu, Maria and Perry) organized it all.

Leaving Fontainebleau with Calha was great. It had been over 2 years (since she moved to the US) that we had not spent quality time together, just the two of us, without rushing. We chatted endlessly - in the taxi, at the airport, in the airplane, at home, and over dinner. We had planned to do all our readings for INSEAD in the plane but could not help enjoying each other’s company. When we arrived in Barcelona, it was under a wild tropical rain. This is how we looked after a 3-min run from the reception to our apartment:

After 15 minutes to get ready (and look good) and around 45 minutes trying to find a cab, we head to the restaurant. Guess which cuisine? Mexican! And what a cool Mexican. My bridesmaids know me well… One margarita down, some guacamole, another margarita down, no hope that the other girls would arrive on time for dinner, some tacos, nachos, more guacamole, more margaritas… And around 1 am the girls arrived. Alice, Maria, Perry and Grizi. Apart from Lu (who could not leave the US) and Carolina Almeida Pires, I had pretty much all my favorite girlfriends with me.

The first night was fun. Already tipsy from the margaritas night with Calha, we moved to one of Barcelona’s best nightclubs: Sutton. The music was great and very danceable. We were all happy. And I performed well. At some point, I was so tired that we went home. Before going to bed, it was still time for some presents:

- Sweaters saying “Fatty & Oldie. MT. #sayyestofatty”

- A veil

- A board with 10 challenges to wear on my neck

- A corny shot cup to wear on my neck as well

On Saturday, we woke up late for a surprise from Lu. She arranged home delivery of healthy food for us: cold pressed juices, healthy granola, yogurt, fruit, and so on. How cute can a bridesmaid be?

We left home around 12:30 and walked through the cities of Barcelona until Federal Café, where we stopped for brunch. From avocado toasts to eggs Benedict, from turmeric latte to cappuccinos, we had it all and it was yummy. Also, it was the only thing that I managed to pay the entire weekend, and it was because I was sneaky and the girls did not realize that I stood up from the table. After that, we wandered around Las Ramblas, Bairo Gotico, the Marina, and Mercado San Jose. By 7 pm, we were back home with a few drinks, ready for a typical bachelorette game. I had to answer very particular questions about Gorda. For every correct answer, I would get a present. For every wrong one, I had to drink a sip of wine. The questions were hard but I did a damn good job answering them. About 6 questions before the end (there were 30 questions in total), there were no presents left. My bridesmaids were expecting me to know Gorda less well. Hehehe.

After the game and the presents, which included from panties to lipstick and from face mask to hair bands, we got ready to rock another night out. We had an amazing Spanish dinner at Pez Vela (YUM) and then went clubbing in Bling Bling. I manage to check all the challenges, and it was fun. Lots of fun.

On Sunday, we rushed out of our apartment around 11 am and had the best brunch ever at Flax&Kale, not before a very needed manicure session. To finish the weekend in style, we went for a walk and small photo session at Park Guell, and then moved to the airport all together, happy but extremely happy.

The weekend could have hardly been better. It was cosy, intimate, and fun. I will be forever grateful to my girls for all the organization, sponsoring and love during the weekend. What a lucky girl…

Below you can find the non-censored pictures of the weekend: